I'm really good at making people feel like there in love with me.. Till they see the real me and they realise I'm not worth being with. Everyone says they love me but they never really do they love me in that moment and at that time. Everyone promises me they love me but are the fastest to run away when things get hard. I'm so honest and open about my BPD n I let people make up there own mind, but I then get treated with kid gloves and it's clear Im not loved at all. Loving someone is not something you feel in a moment it's something you feel all the time. I love other people for their faults but who is ever really gona love me for mine? Why do I take chances on people who I no I'm not good enough for and I now I will end up hurting them because of how I am? Why can't anyone take a chance on me or really love me.. Am I really that much of a bad person? I'll do anything for anyone and I'm loyal I have a good heart. I just struggle with a disorder I didn't ask for and I don't want. people say they will stay and they won't leave me but they always do. I never do the things I do out of spit or to hurt people I just sometimes don't see what I'm doing.. Being told he doesn't love me anymore has been the thing I needed to set it all free. You don't fall out of love with someone in 3 weeks not someone who you was so scared to loose and who you planned so much with. I'm glad I bow no it wasn't real love and it was in the moment love, because I can now put it to bed rather then thinking someone really did love me..
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